Last year leading up to my birthday I commenced a series of posts summarizing my life at various ages. I never did finish so I figure I might as well try to complete it this year, as my birthday approaches yet again (funny how it does that). Until I pick up my trail you can entertain yourselves looking over the ones I did last year:

• The Huh of 22
• The Ups and Downs of 21
• The Dramas of 20
• The Adventure of 19
• The Trials of 18
• The Excitement of 17
• The Fun of 16
• The Joys of 15
• The Thrill of 14
• The Bliss of 13

Not sure why I started at 13, maybe life was just more interesting after that age. Anyway I will be picking up where I left off shortly. Stay tuned.

• Nov. 12, 2001 - Alone - Watched Monsters Inc. at a late show
• Nov. 12, 2002 - Mummy & Wesley - Went to “Lion King” on tour in Miami
• Nov. 12, 2003 - Boyfriend - Blindfolded surprise then dinner
• Nov. 12, 2004 - Approx. 30 near and dear - Games galore
• Nov. 12, 2005 - Handful of stalwarts - Beach bonanza 

Nov. 12, 2006 (The Big One) - Currently accepting birthday plan proposals (18 days to go)

There’s a door
With a lock;
Only one holds the key

A door
To a place
Far deep within me

This door
In a wall
Is the only way in

The door
Blocks the way
But for one with the will

Face the door -
Move towards
Secrets that lie deep inside

Through the door,
Lies my heart
With nothing left to hide

But a door
Needs a push
If you want to see through

Past a door.
Simple steps
For someone, is it you?

The following is both anecdotal and instructional. Should you find yourself needing to clear a package sent with, let us say UPS, head out to the airport. When you get there and find the yellow and green doors, take heed - you will need to:

1. Present waybill to person at door *show ID
2. Go to window #2, present waybill *show ID
3. Wait while gentleman leafs through folder after folder having tried the initials of you first name, middle name, title and last name to find your document.
4. Pay storage fees, handling, fees, processing fees
5. Take documents to security at warehouse door so she can take one part
6. Purchase 2 customs forms ($30J each) at window #3
7. Fill out forms following instructions posted on wall
8. Take documents to customs officer
9. (Optional) Take documents to UPS agent at window #1 to amend name if incorrectly spelt or (God forbid!) abbreviated *show ID
10. (Optional) Take amendment document to customs officer to sign *show ID
11. (Optional) Take amendment document to customs supervisor for approval
12. (Optional) Take documents to person at door to get number *show ID
13. (Optional) Pay amendment fee ($600J) at cashier *show ID
14. Take documents back to customs officer *show ID
15. Take documents back to security guard at warehouse door
16. Wait while she looks for part she took earlier and writes off some information *show ID
17. Wait for package to be found in warehouse
18. Collect package
19. Take package and documents to new customs officer for examination *show ID
20. Feign surprise when your package has been opened and is covered in dirty fingerprints
21. Take documents and package to window #1 to receive gate pass
22. Take documents and package to person at door *show ID
23. Escape with your sanity and temper barely intact

Now the situation described above is in the case of no duties applied upon examination. Should your goods be deemed dutiable, I suspect you will need to follow steps 1 - 20, then insert steps 10, 12, 13, 14 and then continue with steps 21 - 23. I have also assumed there is no one else waiting in the room there with you so there are no crowds and noise to deal with. Good luck!

I have:

• Written mini-speeches almost on the spot 
• Learned that I speak reasonably well without preparation
• Worn myself out
• Been reminded that everyone has different expectations
• Been surprised by Mother Nature’s reclamations
• ‘Fessed up to a friend
• Been sick and recovered

and probably some more stuff that I am not remembering right now. All I have to say is life is interesting.