Progress is more readily achieved when a person accentuates the positive rather than the negative.

In writings on training, there is often talk of “positive reinforcement”. The findings are that changes in behaviour are effected more quickly and have more lasting effects when the desired behaviour is rewarded rather than the undesired behaviour punished.

We work the same way. And if we are trying to change ourselves or do something we can reward ourselves for the positives and the things done right instead of beating ourselves up over what we did wrong. Not that we ignore the negatives, just don’t make that the focus.

Anyone who has sat through a job evaluation can see the benefit of this. If your boss sat there and when on and on about all the things you did wrong, would you really be that motivated to improve. Those are the evaluations that get people depressed. More encouraging is the sandwich approach where some positives are discussed first, then the negatives, then finish with the positives.

An example that was given was about trying to change your eating habits to be more healthy. If you have some small good habit, e.g. liking to eat fruit, then put more focus on that rather than spending all your energies on trying to cut back on all the sweets. The theory being that the positive behaviours will outweigh the negative.

There are lots of ways this rule could be applied, so look for the positives in your life and celebrate those.