Since it seems I am so incredibly complex and incomprehensible, let’s break it down:
| Old Rules | New Rules |
| If I see you and smile, I’m probably happy to see you |
If I see you and smile, I’m probably faking it |
| If you say hi and I smile, I’m probably in a good mood or happy to see you |
If you say hi and I smile, I’m probably thinking “here we go again” |
| If you ask me a question and I smile, I probably thought the question was cute or funny |
If you ask me a question and I smile, I probably think you’re an idiot |
| If you ask me a question and I answer you like you’re an idiot, I probably thought it was a stupid question |
If you ask me a question and I answer you, I probably thought it was a stupid question
|
| If you talk to me and I smile and nod, I’m probably listening because I’m interested |
If you talk to me and I smile and nod, I’m probably not listening |
| If I say something and laugh, I probably thought it was funny |
If I say something and laugh, I’m probably laughing at you |
| If I say something with a smile, I probably didn’t mean anything by it |
If I say something with a smile, I’m probably thinking something completely different |